Update #2

Emerson seems to be doing OK today. Her fever spiked up to 102 last night, but after Tylenol, her fever has been heading down today. The entourage of doctors and med students just came through and said they will let us know when they get the results of the culture, but that they want to hold her until tomorrow to make sure the antibiotics aree working and to keep an eye on the fever and the diarrhea, which has gotten pretty bad.

Matt was with her last night and didn't get much sleep. She will only sleep when held and sleep is always hard to come by when in a hospital. Plus, because of the diarrhea, she is eating a lot more often. Overall, she does seem to be pretty comfortable. They are going to take more of the wires off in a bit, which will make it even easier to hold and feed her.

We are very glad that Obi is coming up today. We were planning on heading down to Hilton Head for Easter, but now we are staying here and she is coming up to lend a hand. What a relief! Even though we will probably head home tomorrow, I am sure we will have an adjustment period and could use some time to rest.

I have a couple pics of Emerson, but they were taken on the iPad and they aren't great. You can imagine why I was so upset when I saw her yesterday morning. We will keep up the updates. Thank you to everyone for your thoughts and prayers.

Emerson update

I think I should stop blogging because it seems like every time I do and say something about how Emerson is getting better, something bad happens. Emerson had a great day yesterday and was in a great mood. But, at about 8:30, Matt said he thought she felt hot. We took her temperature and she did have a temperature of 101.4. We called the pediatrician on call and she said that you don't mess with a temp like that in a newborn and that we needed to take her to the ER. Matt took her while I stayed home with Beckett.

They put her through a battery of tests to try to see what was wrong, including blood and urine tests and two spinal taps. It makes me cry just to think about her having to endure those painful tests and not having any idea what was happening. They figured out that she has a UTI and have sent some blood samples away to make sure that the bacteria hasn't spread elsewhere. They need about 48 hours to get those results, so we'll be here for a few days.

They have admitted her to the pediatric ward and are doing a very good job of monitoring her. The poor girl has tubes and wires coming out all over her body, but she seems to be doing alright. We can hold her (thank God) but every time we do, the monitors beep while she gets adjusted.

As I sit here, I know there are people all over the place (even on this same hallway) who have children who are far worse off, but my heart is breaking to watch my sweet baby suffer in any way. I know that all of these tests are just to help her, but I want to wrap her up in my arms and take her pain away from her. She seems so tiny in the big hospital crib and her eyes aren't sparkling like they always do. I just keep making deals in my head, hoping that all of these tests come back with optimal results. She has another ultrasound this afternoon; this time to check her kidneys and bladder. Matt and I will continue to switch duties and take turns at home with Beckett. Neither of us have slept too much, so we are trying to make sure that we get some sleep so we are better equipped to deal with everything.

We will keep everyone updated.

Adjustments

It's 1:30pm and everyone in my house is sleeping... for the moment. It's pretty rare that we get Beckett and Emerson to nap at the same time. Call it Murphy's Law, but at this point, it seems like as soon as Beckett gets up from his afternoon nap, Emerson is ready to go down. It's just another one of those lessons that you quickly learn as a parent (especially of two)... you can plan all you want, but what happens is usually the opposite of what you planned. And, you just have to accept that and try to smile and laugh. Matt and I also try to remind ourselves often to see the humor in things, such as during the "witching hour" (usually between 5 and 7 pm) when both children seem to be particularly cranky and loudly tell us that they are unhappy. It's sometimes extremely trying, but we try not to get irritated with each other or the kids and remind ourselves that "this too shall pass".


I think that I was too quick to declare in my last post that Emerson seemed to really be settling in and sleeping surprisingly well. Not two days later, that all got flipped on its head. She has been struggling with what we think is some pretty serious gas, and I eventually took her back to the doctor last week, just to make sure that everything was OK and to get some suggestions of other things we could try. She not only seemed to be struggling in the late afternoon, but she started having really tough times between 4am and 7am every day. It sounded kind of like colic, but she didn't seem to have the other symptoms. After a long discussion with the doctor, she suggested we try a formula that is thicker and has some rice cereal mixed in. She thought this would settle easier and she would have less gas and spit-up. After almost a week, it does seem to be helping a bit.


While at the doctor, they re-measured her head because the doctor was a bit concerned about how large her head is. As I mentioned in a previous post, she was pretty sure that it was just a family trait, as the other three of us also have large heads, but she wanted to make sure that it wasn't a sign of something more serious. So, at the end of the appointment, she said she wanted to have Emerson get an ultrasound just to make sure that everything was OK. As you can imagine, I was immediately very worried and kept asking myself what I would do if something was wrong with my sweet girl. We couldn't get an appointment for the ultrasound until the next day, so we had to wait 24 hours to hear anything. It was a rough day for us, which was compounded by our lack of sleep and our concern for her other bodily issues.


Luckily, the ultrasound revealed that everything was fine, so we were able to breathe easier. We are still having issues with her sleeping, but try to remain optimistic and tell ourselves that things should start to settle down in a month or so. We are big "schedule" people and it's really important that the kids have a pretty strict schedule. I think it helps the kids when they know what to expect at a given time and it gives mommy and daddy some time to get things done and spend time with each other. But, little Emerson is still a little young to conform to a schedule, so we just try to go with the flow.


Everything hasn't been difficult around here. Baby girl has started smiling frequently and it melts my heart to see her look me right in the eyes and smile a huge smile. She also smiles quite a bit a her big brother, despite the fact that he often is right up in her face waving at her two inches from her eyes or kissing her head or trying to feed her, wipe up her spit-up, or shove her bink in her mouth, even if she doesn't want it. I also decided to send Beckett to daycare only three mornings a week, so the other two mornings I am home with both kids. It's like he senses that things are more difficult when there is only one parent, and he has been wonderful. He tries to help out with Emerson and is a very good listener and rule-follower when it's just the three of us. I decided a couple of weeks ago that I just needed to bite the bullet and go out and do something with both kids alone, so we tried lunch at Panera. He was really great there, and since then, I feel much more comfortable venturing out alone with both of them. It also helps keep us sane, knowing we aren't chained to the house while Matt is at work.

Beckett making silly faces

So, despite the lack of sleep and the struggle to figure out how to help Emerson feel better, we are trying to stay upbeat and realize that the difficult times won't last forever. We are all getting used to the idea of being a family of four and are making some memories along the way.


Finally, I am including some pictures that my parents took while they were here.

Bebe and Beckett
Giga and Emmy

Beckett gives kisses to his sister

Emerson yawns

Beckett IS wearing cups for shoes and no pants

Week Three and More Family Time

Emerson seems to be growing right before our very eyes. She is spending more time awake and alert and is sleeping for longer intervals during the day and night. She is smiling often and seems to know her mommy and daddy. She enjoys her bath and her green bouncy chair and certainly loves her bottle. She eats 4 ounces every three hours during the day, but does go about 5 hours between feedings at night. What a good girl!!!

Beckett has become more and more engaged with his little sister and loves to give her kisses and wipe her spit. Before he goes anywhere, he wants to give her many kisses and waves his hand right in front of her face and says, "Bye, Bye, Baby!" He also sometimes likes to remind us that he is a baby too and will point to himself and say, "Beckett, Baby."


We have had wonderful weather here all week (it sounds like most of the country has) so we got to spend a lot of time outside, which has made Beckett extremely happy. As soon as he wakes up, he asks to go outside and has been out there for hours each day this week.

My parents came to help out the past week and we had a really great time. It was wonderful that my dad was in such good health after so long of feeling badly. He was really able to enjoy running around with Beckett and cuddling with Emerson.


Of course, my mom was also thrilled to spend time with her two grandbabies.


Beckett calls my mom Bebe and my dad was Giga all week, which was Beckett's best attempt at "Grandpa." They helped us out by cooking, cleaning, shopping and they even watched the kids on Saturday so that Matt and I could go on a date.



Matt and I have been very lucky to get help from Obi, Bebe and Giga. Beckett and Emerson are also very lucky to be so loved by their grandparents. Finally, below are some pics of Emerson in the same outfit that I came home from the adoption agency in. My parents brought several of my old baby outfits and it's sweet to think of little Emerson wearing them over 30 years later.

Week Two and Settling In

We are learning to settle into a routine as a family of four. Emerson is still a sweet little girl, despite what we think are some issues with gas this week. We are currently trying some new bottles and new sensitive formula to see if that helps her. She had a few days this week where she seemed very uncomfortable (especially during the day) and showed us how well her lungs worked. The past two days have been better, so we're keeping our fingers crossed that her little body is figuring out how to digest and prevent her gas.

Obi headed home last weekend and more than likely spent several days recovering and catching up on her sleep. Beckett still asks about her a week after her departure and we keep telling him that we will be heading down to Obi's house in a few months and that seems to satisfy him (until he asks about her again a few hours later).


Luckily it was Matt's Spring Break, so I had help all week and we were able to come up with a schedule that worked for both of us. Emerson has seemed to figure out her nights and days, and does most of her long stretches of sleep at night. That has certainly been wonderful with regards to our sleep. She is getting more and more alert during the day and still loves to look around and see the world around her. Her umbilical cord fell out yesterday and she had her first bath last night. She just sat quietly in her little tub and looked around. I guess she's a big fan of the warm water.


We took a picture of her this week in the same frog outfit that Beckett came home in almost two years ago. She is the first picture and Beckett is the second. Any doubts that they are related???


It is uncanny, huh? Like I said, looking down at her face makes me think of Beckett at this age.

Anyway, we ventured out a few times this week as a family of four. It certainly makes you feel a bit discombobulated having to run back in the house several times to grab any number of things that you forgot. We also now have this behemoth stroller which holds both of them. It's nice because it has 12 different set-up options, but it's a beast to haul around.


One of our trips out was to the park to play and feed the ducks. Beckett doesn't so much feed the ducks as eat the food intended for them. It's pretty funny!


This is what Emerson did at the park while her brother "fed" the ducks.


Beckett went to daycare in the mornings all week, which gave him a chance to play with his friends and get some time without the baby, and gave us the time to clean and run errands. He does seem to really be enjoying his role as the big brother and wants to hold Emerson, kiss and hug her and touch her hands/feet/elbows, etc. We are working on being gentle, but he is very sweet with her. He often runs up to her crib or her bassinet to see if she is in either. He also likes to lay next to her while she is doing tummy time or looking at her baby toys.



Emerson had her two-week check-up on Friday and she is doing well. She now weighs 8lbs, 15 oz., which means that she is 4 oz. above her birth weight. Her head is 15 inches, which puts her in the 99th percentile for head size. The doctor asked if we had big heads and we said we weren't sure but that her brother also had a big head. The doctor then measured our heads and it turns out that we both have very large heads. So, apparently, we are the big-head family. To prove this, I took a picture of Beckett in one of Matt's old hats.... and it fits him.


So, that's our week. My parents will be here in a couple of days to help out, so that will be nice. Hope everyone has a wonderful week.